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The Real-Life Dating Boot Camp That Inspired ‘Love on the Spectrum’

The New York Times's profile
Original Story by The New York Times
June 12, 2025
The Real-Life Dating Boot Camp That Inspired ‘Love on the Spectrum’

Context:

The dating boot camp initiated by U.C.L.A. psychologists aims to help autistic adults navigate the complexities of dating, a subject that was once avoided by researchers and funders. Bradley Goldman, a participant, struggles with how to disclose his autism during dates, but credits his enjoyable dating experiences to the coaching he received. The Program for the Education and Enrichment of Relational Skills (PEERS) developed by Dr. Elizabeth Laugeson teaches social skills crucial for dating, and has seen a shift in societal attitudes towards autistic adults seeking romance. Reality TV show 'Love on the Spectrum' has played a significant role in changing perceptions, highlighting the challenges and triumphs of autistic individuals in the dating world. Despite criticisms that social skills training encourages masking, participants find value in the program, which emphasizes authenticity and individual choice while providing them with confidence and practical dating skills.

Dive Deeper:

  • Bradley Goldman, a participant in the dating boot camp for autistic adults, faces challenges in deciding whether to disclose his autism on dates, but finds the coaching from U.C.L.A. psychologists beneficial in navigating social interactions.

  • The Program for the Education and Enrichment of Relational Skills (PEERS) was created by Dr. Elizabeth Laugeson to teach social skills to autistic individuals, focusing on communication, identifying flirting cues, and managing conversation silences.

  • Initially, funding for research and programs on dating for autistic individuals was hard to secure due to societal apprehensions, but the success of 'Love on the Spectrum' has shifted perceptions and highlighted the need for such initiatives.

  • Participants like Jess and Hayley Ditter have found the course helpful in understanding and replicating social behaviors necessary for dating, despite their previous struggles with social cues and dating experiences.

  • Critics argue that social skills training can lead to masking, where autistic individuals feel pressured to behave in ways that are not natural to them, but the program addresses this by emphasizing authenticity and personal choice.

  • The boot camp has been life-changing for many participants, boosting their confidence and providing them with the skills needed to pursue romantic relationships, as evidenced by the positive experiences and outcomes they report.

  • The initiative is part of a broader movement toward recognizing and respecting the rights of neurodiverse individuals, with the PEERS program playing a key role in this shift by offering a supportive environment for learning and growth.

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